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Flying will never be the same again.

As I sat in the limo alone, trying to steady my breath, I was surprised by how nervous I was to join the Mile High Club. New sexual experiences rarely give me the jitters. I’ve been to countless orgies, fucked multiple celebrities, and even hosted a few sex parties. So nothing phases me anymore, except, I learned, going on a private plane to fuck one of the biggest porn stars in the business: Ryan Keely. If you enjoy stepmom porn, you've probably seen her videos. (If not, stop what you are reading and go watch. I’ll wait.)

Two months earlier, I'd been invited to try Love Cloud, a Las Vegas-based company that takes you and a partner up in a private plane to have sex. The offer came from Cake, a sexual wellness company that makes a range of lubes, sex toys, and condoms. They'd foot the $1,195 bill Love Cloud typically charges for customers to join the Mile High Club—all so I could mention how Cake was about having new and exciting sexual experiences.

I’d used and enjoyed their lube before, and I've always wanted to have sex in a plane, so obviously, I said, "Fuck yes."

I had planned on bringing my boyfriend, but we broke up just a week before the scheduled flight. Scrounging to find someone who’d be open to a last-minute adventure, I decided to ask Ryan. We'd been friends for about six months, and I'd wanted to sleep with her from the moment I laid eyes on her.

“We can film it, too, so you have content for OnlyFans,” I suggested via text.

Ryan’s response was quick: “Absolutely.”

So there I was, shaking in this limo, cycling through catastrophic possibilities: What if I can’t get hard? What if I get motion sickness on this plane? What if we don’t fuck? Cake is paying for this goddamn trip. I need to have something to write up. Right before the driver pulled up to Ryan’s place, I took a Rugiet Ready, a new form of ED treatment I prefer to Viagra, hoping that would at least solve any potential dick problems.

The driver opened the door, and I grabbed the bouquet of roses provided by Love Cloud. Standing outside the limo, I felt like I was heading to prom, only instead of wearing a suit, I was wearing a slutty pilot’s outfit. Ryan stepped out of her door, dressed as a slutty flight attendant—yes, we had coordinated this. When I saw her, my anxiety didn’t vanish; it got worse. My hands were so shaky, I couldn’t even unlock my phone to take a picture of her. She looked like a fantasy coming to life, and I was way out of my league.

The moment she stepped into the limo, she said, “I’m so nervous.” I let out a huge breath I hadn’t realized I was holding. “Thank God!” I replied. “I am, too.” We both smiled.

I asked why she was nervous. She's Ryan Fucking Keely—a porn star extraordinaire whose job is to have sex. Shouldn’t this be like another day on set?

“Yeah, but it’s different,” she said. “I’ve never had sex in the sky, ya know?”

We popped a bottle of complimentary champagne, hoping it would ease our nerves. The limo pulled up to the plane at a small airport a few miles off the Vegas strip, and our pilot, Tony, opened our limo door. “Are you ready?” he asked.

I looked at Ryan. “Ready as we’ll ever be,” I replied.

The airplane was tiny. We opened the passenger door to see two small seats for takeoff and landing, a twin bed with red satin sheets, and a few pillows. Ryan, at 5’9", and I, at 6’4", are not petite individuals. It just meant we’d have to have sex in more intimate sexual positions, taking up as little space as possible.

After the pilot recited the safety instructions, Ryan asked if he would be able to hear us having sex. “No,” he replied. “I have noise canceling headphones and will constantly communicate with the flight controller. I can’t hear anything, so if you need to me, you need to open up the curtain and tap my shoulder.”

“But what if we want you to hear?” I asked, hoping to break the tension. Tony laughed.

We hopped in, set up our cameras to record, and took a seat for take-off. As the plane rose into the sky, Ryan lifted her legs in the air, shooting some solo content, and that—that—was when my nerves dissipated, only to be replaced with one thought: “I need to fuck you right now.”

Still buckled, I started making out with Ryan as she played with herself, and once the lights went off, indicating we were free to move about the cabin, we were both insatiable. She pushed me down on the bed and gave me a little strip tease. She twerked her ass on top of me. When I touched her, she said: “Not yet.”

After what felt like hours of being teased—though I’m sure it was only a few minutes—she lay down on her back and gave me the come hither motion with her fingers. I got on top of her, and well, you can imagine what happened next.

I was surprised that we could do any position we wanted to: doggy style, cowgirl, missionary, etc. While the plane was small, it was just big enough to do everything you wanted.

But it wasn't the mere mechanics and positions that made the sex so great. We were hooking up a goddam plane: the ultimate sexual bucket list activity. Knowing that we were doing one of the most adventurous and coveted sex acts of all time was incredibly psychologically arousing. I felt like a powerful sex god.

After we both came, we lay down on the mattress, our limbs intertwined. Our adrenaline had been spiking for hours, so with the sweet release of orgasm, we could finally relax. I took a little cat nap before Ryan woke me, saying, “Lights are on; we have to take our seats.”

The flight down was bumpy, not for those who get queasy, but it was expected, given how tiny the plane was. Once we landed, Tony opened the door for us and asked how it was.

“Life-changing,” I said, and I meant it.

As a sex writer and general boyslut, I have had countless sexual experiences. I’ve loved nearly all of them. There’s only one con to my life(style): With each sexual experience, the ante gets raised, and it’s challenging to find a new adventure that will top it— that will get my blood rushing and give me that intoxicating adrenaline rush.

But that’s the beautiful thing about sex. There’s always more you can do, whether with someone new, in a public place, using toys, or exploring new kinks. Sex never has to get boring—and when you try that new thing, no matter how nervous the thought gets you, it can lead to some of the best goddamn sex of your life. It can even lead you to join the Mile High Club with America’s most famous stepmom.

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